And it’s Sunday again.
The weeks seem to pass me by so quickly lately. They say time flies when you’re having fun, but it also flies when you’re not. For the past few weeks, my life has been consumed by job and house hunting; a battle which feels both relentless and draining. The truth is, not knowing where I’ll be living or what I’ll be doing in 2 months is pretty terrifying. My anxiety manifests itself in a fear of the unknown and the constant need to be in control. I’m the sort of person to double, triple, quadruple check the route to a destination, the invitation to a party, or the deadline to an essay. I need to know when exactly something’s happening, what exactly is happening and exactly what I’ll be doing when it does happen. Unfortunately, living in a society torn apart by a pandemic is pretty unpredictable. I always heard that life post-graduation was a little difficult; finding a career which interests you, pays the bills and makes you feel like those three years of hard work and debt were worthwhile can be tough. Add a virus which decimates entire fields of work to the mix and you’ve got a recipe for post-graduation disaster. I’ve applied to countless jobs - school receptionist, court administrator, aldi team member, nursery worker... and... nothing.
The one thing which has brought me through this tough time is my love for food. In a world where all else is uncertain, the warmth that cottage pie and sausage and mash provide is guaranteed. I wouldn’t say that I’ve been eating my feelings, but the enjoyment and sense of satisfaction I get from producing a meal I’m proud of really is something special. If all the job applications and house enquiries I send out in a day are ignored, I can at least feel content in the evening as I sit down to a delicious meal I cooked myself.